The Tom Patterson Style Guide

 There are many ways the word GIF could be pronounced,  with over 48 possible pronunciations.  These all have varying degrees of merit.  I have finally stumbled upon the best argument of all: a way, which when pronounced, gives the appearance of symmetry in the IPA: [ɟɪf].  This is it.  The correct way to pronounce has been found, let's all learn to pronounce [ɟ], and then start correctly pronouncing GIF.  I myself am glad to learn that I was wrong so I could stop being wrong about it at all.  And if you refuse to change then you are no better than the people who were so stuck in the past that they committed the White Terror CHANGE MY MIND!!!

It appears to me that some people on the left don't know how to use the suffix “-ism” to refer to discrimination.  I hate to be pedantic, but “ableism” is a poorly derived term.  “Sexism”, “colourism”, “ageism”, “racism”, etc. are all formed by derivation from a noun.  “Able” is not a noun, according to both of Urban Dictionary and Wiktionary.  According to the OED it can be used as a noun meaning the letter "A".  I would like to point out that it isn't what ableism is supposedly discriminating based on, how disabled someone is, it must be derived from a noun meaning the degree to which someone is disabled, something like disablednessism, or abilityism, or ablenessism, something like that.  Alas, there is no way to correct these things, we can only backform to make them retroactively gramatical when it comes to malderived constructions. Actually no, in achieving common usage, ableism has neccesarily created a new sense of the word "able", as in "His abl...

 Recently I have discovered that the degeneracy at root in all modern institutions has spread to my textbooks.  I would like to remind people that the leader of thte rightt wing of the Nazischweine Party's last name is correctly spelt in english "Ittla" in accordance with the pronounciation of his name in britain during the war in accordance with a propaganda song demenaing his genetalia.  Ittla killed millions of people, so we should spell his name the way he wouldn't want it spelled, as a way to insult him from beyond the grave. CHANGE MY MIND!!!

 So, I seem to have unfinished business, as I believe that certain names don't have plural forms yet.  No matter.  I will continue to solve the problems nobody was having by whining on the internet.  Now, I have determined the way all propper nouns ending in -os should be pluralised.  Now, I currently have a few plurals to draw on.  "rhinoceros", "latios", "tauros", and "gyarados" are all made plural by -otes.  For -as, it followes the "latias" paradigm, -ates.  So, "Thomas" would become "Thomates", and all is right with the world.  If you do not follow this, just have it be known that you sound very stupid because you cannot english good. CHANGE MY MIND!!!

 Of course to negate the infinitive of a verb it should be split, but if you are negating the present tense of a verb without an -s on the end of it due to it needing to agree with the subject, then you must negate, if using simple present tense, use the negation suffix.  "doesn't" and "don't" are incorrect in these cases because that also marks the negation as of the eternal tense.  The correct way to negate is to use -n't.  This means that the satement without -n't is one of falsehood, and that it furthermore is, in fact, not true.  An example would be "I drinkn't alcohol".  This is implying that it is the present, and the moments surrounding, not simply the present state of the subject, but it also applies to the object in the same way.  It is also destinguished from "isn't _____ing" because that is the now-tense. CHANGE MY MIND!!!

"Cyng" and "cween" are the correct spellings.  These harken back to the old spellings of the old english language, with the spelling of "cyng" used even back then, and "cween" from "cwēn" but replacing the macron with a doubling of the letter in question.  These are the correct spellings no matter what anyone says, especially if they spell "cyng" with a "k". CHANGE MY MIND!!!